This RIO is ready to take the front seat.

Try as they might to do the contrary Mom and Dad raised a Goose, not a Maverick. Goose, as most of us know, was the role made famous by Anthony Edwards in Top Gun. As the Radar Intercept Officer (RIO) for Tom Cruise's Maverick, Goose literally and figuratively took a backseat to his charismatic Alpha Male buddy. But that was what he was supposed to do, as Goose was by most accounts popular culture's gold standard for Beta Males.

A Beta Male as defined by Urban Dictionary is "an unremarkable, careful man who avoids risk and confrontation. Beta males lack the physical presence, charisma and confidence of the Alpha male."

Betas can certainly from time to time exhibit Alpha characteristics, but its not who we are in our blood. Popular culture dictates that Beta Males make ideal sidekicks and wingmen. Betas lack the self assuredness and ego necessary to be a natural front runner. Beta Males don't like buzzing the tower.

For about 7 years now, I've been passively trying to get off my ass and do a real triathlon. But I failed to grab the bull by the horns and commit. I could blame my passivity on my Beta tendencies, but its probably more likely that I was just being lazy.

My Dad's diagnosis late last summer provided all the motivation that I needed to finally do something. I'm not doing this triathlon for myself. I'm doing it for my Dad who I know will be better by the time I'm done training in May. And that's why this Goose is in this race to win, as completely unreasonable and unrealistic as that sounds.

And even though ultimately Goose gets cooked, Top Gun has proven to be the exception rather than the rule of Betas getting the short end of the stick... at least according to the movies. Here are a few notable examples of Betas succeeding.

(Superbad -2007) We can all rest easy knowing that TV and Movie producers can always turn to Michael Cera to effectively portray awkward, introspective nerds for years to come. And yes, in case you were wondering, Jonah Hill was obviously the movie's Alpha Male.




(Back to the Future -1985) Ironically enough Alpha Male Marty McFly helped his Beta Male father George McFly overcome his Alpha Male tormentor Biff. Also its unfortunate that there are not more women named Lorraine out there. Every girl should be so lucky to be somebody's density... I meant destiny.




(Sideways -2004) Pig Vomit from the Howard Stern movie and Lowell from Wings show the classic Beta-Alpha friendship.










Pictured here with TV's favorite ad pitchman and Alpha Male older brother, Eli Manning proved to Tiki Barber that Beta Males can in fact win a Superbowl.